Sick Baby

At 11 months old, Aspen got very sick. She was running a fever for almost 9 days and I had taken her to the Dr. 4 times in that week. I finally gave in and was worried about her not eating, so I took her to the hospital and they told me she had Hand-Foot and Mouth disease... great. They also drew blood and attempted to get an IV in her little arm until it was bruised and my Mom and I wanted to punch the stupid nurse. They told us the bloodwork came back saying there was no infections and she would be just fine.......

I took her home with the BABY VICODIN they gave me to keep her comfortable and trusted that now my baby would get better. It is such a helpless feeling to see them so sick and know there isn't a "magic mom button" to make it all better! I got so crazed from stress and sleep deprivation that I swore outloud I would cut my own arm off if it would make her feel even just the tiniest bit better. She was a wilted flower, even got to the point I couldn't rouse her and she didn't even want to cry... just be held by Mom.....

So THEN I took her back to the pediatrician so she could see how very sick my baby was, and upon looking in her throat she asked us if we wanted to drive to the PICU or if we would like to take an ambulance!!!! Aspen had a mass the size of an EGG in her throat. I remained surprisingly calm and we drove. I contacted my work and found the number for an ENT that we use and really like, called Chris and my Folks to let them know we were on our way there etc. She had a cat scan and all kinds of tests done to discover this Tonscillar Abscess in the back of her throat that again, was the size of a large egg and FULL OF INFECTION (see above for the reason of all caps and my frustration)... She had to go into surgery immediatly and it was the most heart- wrenching, helpless feeling of my entire life. I kept a smile on for Aspen and repeated what a good girl she was and how happy we all were she was going to feel better etc. As soon as the nurse took her away and the doors closed (Aspen was crying Mama, and waving bye bye *stab to the heart*) I literally hit my knees!

One of my very best friends, Lindsay, ended up coming down to the hospital to wait with Us and my parents... I was so distraught and she is such a great friend (also Aspens Godmama) she hurried down to cry with me, which was such a help. Friends are treasures.

Anyway, they came out of surgery just fine and told us that in another 12 hours Aspen most likely would have been dead. Either from the mass suffocating her in her sleep, or rupturing and basically drowning her to death from all the fluid... Thank God we had it taken care of! It is very rare in adults to get an abscess like that, even more rare in children and almost unheard of in infants.

We stayed 3 days in the hospital and it was nice for us both to be able to recover. I was so worn out from taking care of her! Chris stayed one night with us, but had to work and there is only one rock-hard couch in the rooms- so I made him go home to get good sleep. Also, as the Mama, I physically felt like it would be impossible for me to leave the building. My family all took turns droping in to check on us and Grandma/ Grandpa were there a few times a day looking after snoodle-butt. She is a loved baby.

The night nurse was rediculous.... Aspen was having OSA, from the narcotics I believe, but she had the nerve to tell me that "babies don't get apnea", BULLSHIT! So when I asked for her to be put on O2 the nurse gave me attitude and wanted to know how I knew anything about it (heheheeee) so I replied (it's a little stretch, but felt good) "I am a polysomnographic technician with an emphasis on pediatric respritory medicine, so please either put my daughter on oxygen or let me speak to someone who will." HA! She did. When we came home I borrowed a POX to moniter her at home for a few days *thanks Kristen!* and all was well. I figured it would be, but as a mom with those resources and knowledge base, who just found out her baby almost died, who wouldn't be a little paranoid?!

UGH! She is doing fantastic now, and the recovery was relatively easy! I was so relieved something got done for her, and also a little frustrated that it feels like in order to get people to pay attention to you it's like you have to pitch a fit!

We were so happy to see these smiles :)